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[09 May 2006|09:12pm] |
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so uHhm yeah,this shit is fucking dead.live young die FAT!!!
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[23 Dec 2005|08:54pm] |
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so im in l.a. now. weird to think i have a really great job.
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[23 Nov 2005|10:13pm] |
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i dont updtae that much anymore.......goodbye.!
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| i wonder who would win between two vampires fighting over a bloody tampon? |
[28 Oct 2005|12:36am] |
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mood |
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 high |
] |
today i thought of something crazy,
what if this girl liked you alot but you liked this other.
so time goes by and bam the next thing you know is that you start to like her later in life.but now shes taken!!
today i played that part dont know why.
im sick of relationships but why do i want one so bad?
today was fun.
smoked 2 chronic blunts. cherry chronic!
i dont really know how to explain my day.it was adventurous and suspenceful?
i really like this girl.i moved on fast.a little two fast.
why do all the good ones have boyfriends???
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| pull the trigger and the nightmare stops |
[19 Oct 2005|11:51pm] |
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mood |
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 disappointed |
] |
man i want out.
through with you.
done with all those fucking tears.
all my friends hate each other.
but some for the right reason.
i dont blame you.
but rest assure im moving on,i miss you less with each day your gone...
by the way im fucking emo if thats what you wanna hear you fucking pahtetic bitches.
and also fuck you.
done.
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| ok? |
[18 Oct 2005|11:57pm] |
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mood |
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 jealous |
] |
today was fucking weird?
kelsey you missed out.
today i say kelsey for a few,but not for very long.well i saw her until
her and nick got into a dumb argument kinda fight thing.i dont wanna explain what happened because its a waste of type.
but.....put it this way..it ended up with her kicking a whole in her hallway upstairs by her room and in tears when i called her.i felt so bad since i didnt do shit about the argument like atleast step in.i hope she doest get in any more shit than she is already in.
later that day we meet up with angel at the park.he picked up some honey oil.man that shit was dank!!put some in a bowl or on a cigarette which ever you perfer.while i got very bored at the park i decide to go with my friend filepe,antonio and mike to go buy cigarettes.it was very adventurous.we walked down the hill but,on the way down we stumble onto a dead dog.say its black nutts.his whole body was covered with signs.while crossing the street to go to exxon,i see this girl wearing a rug for like a jacket kinda thing.filepe went into exxon.but it makes me pissed when i cant puchase cigarettes because i lost my i.d.after filepe came out we started walking up the hill we see that one girl with the rug.so they crossed the street and we stared talking to her.she was with a friend also.turned out her name was breana.i dont know how to spell it.after that we went back to the park and smoked.later that night ana hangs out with us and we drank mad dog 20-20.and went home.i wanted to call kelsey all night.i wanted to know if she wanted to hang out tommarrow with out nick.but not to put out nick its just i hate how he acted like a dick to kelsey lately and made her cry twice.im sick that shit man!im taking a stand or no one will.it was like this when elliot left and is still like this even though he's back.
talking to dee2 on aim.
12:23am
bored.
stoned.
kinda still drunk.
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| Don't shake, i hate to see you tremble!! |
[18 Oct 2005|01:52am] |
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mood |
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 okay |
] |
my weekend went so well but i dont know why i felt so out of it.
i felt like i was a moving ghost.it was kinda cool but i still wasn't digging it.so,i hung out with kelsey all weekend.we picked her up like sometime between the hour of like 3:30 and 5:00 but i dont remember.i was so fucking blazed.but i do remember during that time was me bitching at nick to get there at three thirty.i was pretty excited to see kelsey evey though i havent seen her in like 4 or 5 days at that time.on saturday we got drunk.
it was me,dave,kelsey,leanna, and nick.we drank bacardi razz.i got so fucked up ,the drinking put me to sleep.
but before i started to fall asleep.i saw that kelsey was passed the fuck out on the couch.so i say to her,"catch me before i fall".but she doesnt hear me, and i pass out on the floor next to her.it was weird because i ended up waking up at 5 in the morning when leanna has to pick up taryn at work.kelsey i guess woke up also.we talked to each other and fell back asleep.
by the time you know it the sun comes out.fucking blinding me through the glass door.so i think to myslelf man its going to probably a lame sunday.
usually sunday we dont do anything.we sat and watched football games,and we also smoked alot.
the time was getting late for kelsey.she had to be home at six.so we took her home.
the whole drive to her house was,man why do i fucking like her so much?or why does she think im not the one she wants?
so monday was i guess an hour and like forty three hours ago.
i just sat around with nick.smoked cigarettes.
later that night we went to "the observatory" as alot of people call it.
we drank got stoned and watched the ocean.elliot came back so we smoked and drank his ass out.i saw matt and his friend chick stephanie.they were there.
today i hope to see kelsey and atleast get to see her for a few hours.i have to call her at ten and i wont be a tad second late and do you know why?
i dont know.if you find out tell me later.im going to bed.
A Boy Brushed Red.... Living In Black And White
Can you feel your heartbeat racing?
Can you taste the fear in her sweat?
You've done this wrong
It's too far gone
These sheets tell of regret
I admit that I'm just a fool for you
I am just a fool for you
Here is where we both go wrong
Tonight's your last chance to
Do exactly what you want to
And this could be my night
This is what makes me feel alive
Makes you feel alive
Here is where we both go wrong
So sign me up
And toss this key
'Cause for now we're
Living in this moment
And we both ignore the truth
Its all over
Its all over
I feel your heart against mine
So take a breath and close your eyes
[chorus]
Your lungs have failed and they both stopped breathing
My heart is dead and its way past beating
Something has gone terribly wrong
I'm scared, you're scared, we're scared of this
I never thought we'd make it out alive
I never told you but its all in your goodbyes
It's all in your goodbyes
Well look who's dying now
Slit wristless sleeping with the girl next door
I always knew you were such a sucker for that
It doesnt matter what you say
You never mattered anyway
Never mattered anyway
In this moment that we both ignore the truth
It's all over
It's all over
I feel your heart against mine
So take a breath and close your eyes
[chorus]
Don't shake, i hate to see you tremble
Trembling you've lost your touch
Haven't you run so addicted.
-underoath-
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| dancin' in the rain..... |
[18 Oct 2005|12:55am] |
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mood |
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cold |
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monday?
not anymore according to the time now it is saturday.
another day,
another week,
another month.
and here i still wait.
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[15 Oct 2005|09:53pm] |
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mood |
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crappy |
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blah
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[12 Oct 2005|11:20pm] |
| [ |
mood |
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 drunk |
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do ever have that feeling?the feeling you get when someone you love has just turned you away.the feeling of never kissing or touching them ever again and it hurts so bad just to think of all those times when you had the chance to?i've had this sickness this whole entire week.
man how three days could change your entire life.
cant go to kelseys house anymore.
i cant go home.
why?
i dont know why?i just wont.
so lately i've been out of it.
you say, "emo".
i say,"im just thinking".
well.. i havent really wrote anything in this journal lately but just random bullshit i write because i get really fucking lazy.
i still have really nothing to talk about but i'll give you my blur.
today was okay i guess?nothing really to do.just the same as usual.but,we went to mission valley because dave had some acting thing he was dying to go to.we get there ,and theres like all these ten to like twelve year old kids there.after that we went to in n out or something like that. we sat around,ate,used the bathroom,and smoked alot of cigarettes.it got alot boring without the presence of kelsey by my side.
after that me,dave,nick, and chris got stoned in bonita and parked across the street of elliots dads house.the night got boring and we all went home and here i am.
right now im drinking a "fat tire".its amber ale beer from new belgium.its pretty good.it feels good to have a beer after such a long time....
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[05 Oct 2005|05:00pm] |
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mood |
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 crazy |
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| [ |
music |
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the vandals |
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so michelle is coming tommarrow.
keep strumming your guitars.
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[28 Sep 2005|01:51pm] |
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if i fall..........
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[25 Sep 2005|11:56pm] |
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mood |
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high |
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so today was fun i think.
all you have to know is ,it was fun.
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[25 Sep 2005|11:48pm] |
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mood |
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blah |
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music |
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matchbook romance |
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A pictures worth a thousand words.
But not worth the words I need to hear,
I miss you so much that it hurts.
And tonight, I wish you were here with me,
So I could make you see..
The stars, they lay across the sky so perfectly
They remind me of
All the times, when we used to sit underneath them, those summer nights
And fall in love.......
Its not alright, it's our last night together.....
I won't give up, I can't let go, of you.
I can't let go of you.
And tonight, I close my eyes and dream that she
is still the one, laying there beside me...
I'd walk a thousand miles,
I'd swim across the sea.
What do I have to do, please just tell me!
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[20 Sep 2005|03:23pm] |
so today is nicks birthday,and we are still siitting at daves house doing nothing but fucking sitting.i hate these days.so plaid out are boring.so far this morning we bought a bottle of jim beam mother fuckers.i dont really know whats going on today but today better be at the least alright.i get to see kelsey in little bit.you know what im going to end it here.
(stoned)
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[18 Sep 2005|04:34pm] |
| [ |
mood |
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 loved |
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music |
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a band that none of you trendy sluts could play out. |
] |
yesterday was fun.....we had a weird little kick back at daves moms house.shes out of town...nicks birthday on tuesday.i think we might throw him a party.well.im back with kelsey and for the first time.im not being fucking emo about this.but i love that girl to death.so guys if you want her you cant have her("nick')jk......i dont know what to do today.so many things to do but so little time.clothes in the dryer right now so thats a start.man its weird all of our friends are seperating.so much drama sometimes.but ummm i hate typing sometimes so im going to go write a song about me jumping off a cliff so you guys could call me fucking emo!!!!
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[20 Apr 2005|10:39pm] |
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happy 420 day!!
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[23 Mar 2005|02:28pm] |
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once i thought to myslef is there anyone that could ever change this world.?no one will!!
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[13 Mar 2005|07:20pm] |
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life is boring hand me the bong!!
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[15 Feb 2005|03:30pm] |
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hi kelsey.happy valentines day!!
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